Wednesday, May 2, 2012

It's Wednesday!

I must say I am very proud of myself. I started my "diet" and exercise program Monday. I forgot all about pictures on Monday, but yesterday I remembered. I have dropped about 4 pounds since Monday!!! I know, I know, it is water weight, but the scale is being good to me, so I will take it. My hubby is off on Friday's and I got lucky and managed to get this Friday off too. A day off for relaxing together, ummmm yeah right. We have already planned to spend it in the yard. (SIGH) I decided our yard needs a makeover and we are planting flowers in the yard and wait for the best out our pool!!! I am dreading that pool with a passion. Oh well, I will be keeping active on my day off so maybe I can burn some fat! Our weekend is pretty much open. Which is always nice. That is something we rarely have, so I hope it stays that way. :)

I can't get the pictures upright! You get the point though. :) 

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Gotta get up and GO!

Next month will be one year from my surgery. It's kind of bittersweet. My intial goal was to be 100 pounds from my starting weight. But here I am 40 pounds heavier then I wanted to be. I can't be completely negative and hard on myself for not accomplishing that first goal. I have to think positive thoughts and think about how far I have come. Now with that being said, I am not calling it a year yet. My surgery date was 5/27/11, so it looks like I have a little over 30 days to add to my 60 pound weight loss.

This week I am going to kick it into high gear and exercise my tail off. I brought an eliptical and probably should not have. I never use it, I'd rather walk outside or ride my bicycle. I am usually making excuses not to exercise or the reason I can't, but I have been doing that long before a job or a child and it has to stop. I just have to DO IT! PERIOD! I'm going to make it a point to take a picture of myself exercising and post on here at least 3x a week. That may help me get on the right track on the whole exercise thing. We will see!

I'm going to leave you guys with some updated pictures. :)

Monday, January 30, 2012

Starting over

I feel like such a failure. Here I am thinking I have not gained any weight (I haven't weighed in a while) well I step on the scale this morning and I am about 8 pounds up since December! I can't believe I fell that HARD! I have just stopped doing everything. What in the world is wrong with me? Even though I feel so much better then I did at 280, I am not done! I weighed in at 220 this morning and I'm so depressed about that!  I called my Dr. this morning and set up an appointment this afternoon for a fill. I just need to put this behind me. I'm sitting here trying to figure out why I drifted from my diet and stopped thinking about losing the weight...but I really can't give myself or anyone else an answer. I am human and I am imperfect and I made a mistake. Now I know the mistake and will not make it again. I can't just drift and not think about it, because if I do, I will wake up this time next year typing this same thing except not an 8 pound weight gain by an 80 pound weight gain. I can not and will not allow that to happen. So here is to liquids for the next few days and the scales going in a negative direction!

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

I'm seriously struggling!

I've been MIA for a while now. I can make all kinds of excuses for my absence, but it all comes down to being a slacker! I've made three appointments to the dr. since November and have ended up canceling all of them. I haven't had a weight gain but no lose either. I know I have got to get my butt in gear and start again. I just got to get motivated again. I realize I am not at my goal and have about 60 more pounds to lose. What is wrong with me? I have this amazing tool-why am I have I fallen off? Why us it so hard to start again? Somethings got to give with me!!!

I think I may have some insight on my lack of motivation. You tell me? I am the type of person to always think positive. Always! Well it's getting harder and harder. I will just begin with this year. That should be enough. M got sick new years eve and was sick for a good 3 days, then gave it to me and I passed it to her daddy. Great! Let's move on. I come home from work and realize that a check was missing from our mailbox, cone to think of it we haven't had any mail in 3 days. We live in a small town, so I contact our mailman and he informs me we have had a good bit of mail that he has delivered! Bam!!! Some stupid their is stealing our mail. Lord what next? Our dogs are missing!!! Yes, someone has stolen our bulldog and boxer. :( after a week they were located and we have them back home. Thank God! Can you take anymore? M and I are on the way to daycare and BAM a truck ran a stop sign and hit my car! Not only did he hit my car but he hit M's door!!!! :( I panic and am shaking like crazy! Luckily, she was okay and so was I, physically anyway. My car that was going to be paid off, after five years of payments is GONE!!! TOTALED!

I think the reason I have not updated is because I hate being a downer. But this is what it is right now for me. I am praying to God that it gets better. On all sides!

I have to end with a positive note...kinda. I ordered the insanity workout DVDs and I'm on my fifth workout!! There is a reason why they named it insanity! I love it though. I feel so good afterwards. Now I just got to get my behind to the doctor for a fill.

Friday, November 11, 2011

Love some Fall weather!

We will be spending this weekend picking up pecans! My yard is in a complete mess. I will be very happy to see it clean! Come Monday it will probably be in the same shape it is in now, but hey, at least we can say that we tried. I do enjoy this weather though. The air seems so fresh and clean. I love the color of the leaves on the trees, that Christmas time is right around the corner. Awww. I think I sleep better too! Thanksgiving is right around the corner!Since my last unfill, I have not had any restriction whatsoever! Tuesday I have an appointment for a fill. Apart of me wants to cancel and say screw it-and get the fill after Thanksgiving! The other part of me knows that I need this fill. Even though I have not gained, I have not lost. My goal is to lose 100 pounds by May 2012. That means I have less then 7 months to lose about 40 pounds. This may not sound like a lot, but I know the weight is going to start slowing really S-L-O-W. Whatever I decide about my fill, I know that I am not going to over due it at Thanksgiving. I have a plan and I am going to stick to it, no matter how good the food taste!

We had some fall pictures done. M was not in the mood to take pictures, and wanted to play the whole time. The photographer did an awesome job!

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Where to Begin

This has been a helluva month for us! I really don't even know where to start with this. So I will start with a couple of days after my "hand me a cup" post. It was a beautiful Sunday morning, I was clipping coupons and putting a grocery list together. I made lunch (can't remember what) but I do remember that after two bites I was STUCK! So I made that unpleasant trip to the restroom and was fine a few minutes later...I skipped the rest of lunch. Fast forward to dinner that night...same crap. Monday was all liquids. Tuesday I had tuna salad which came back up after a few bites, dinner was liquids. Wednesday lunch went down the toilet! At this point I was sick and tired of it. I decided I would go on liquids for a few days and maybe everything will go back to normal. Well it didn't! Thursday morning I couldn't even get water to stay down. It was horrible. I called my surgeon and he told me to come right away. After a 2 hour drive I was waiting in his office. He gave me a complete unfill and put me on a 7 day liquid diet.

After all my drama with my band being too tight. M woke up Sunday morning screaming. We went in to get her out of her crib to watch her go lifeless in my arms. I freak out and start out the door to the ER. She was unresponsive and pale as cotton! We get to the ER where they do xrays of head and chest and take blood work. Everything was checking out and finally got the blood work back and her sugar levels were 40, which is way to low. We were admitted and stayed in the hospital for 2 days. We now know that M is anemic and have to keep a check on her sugar levels. This on top of cold/flu season on top of teething...I am going to be bald before 2012.

Things are getting back to "normal" again! Thank God!!! We went trick-or-treating the other night and had a little costume party at work. I dressed up as Snooki, from Jersey Shore. M was Minnie Mouse. She was so cute. Here are some pics of us!

The Friday and Saturday before Halloween we went out to the haunted forest. Friday night I went with the girls and Saturday I went with my honey and a couple of our friends. So scary! It was really fun though.                                                                                                                                                  

Here is a before and after picture of me. Everybody thinks I look so much different! I love it.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Hand Me a Cup

Pink Measuring Cups
My surgeons goal all along was to get me satisfied with one cup per meal. Which means protein shake for breakfast, one cup of food for lunch and one cup of food for supper. Great plan, I know.

I never thought I would get to this point. I never thought "One Cup" would fill me up. Well I was wrong! I am satisfied with LESS then one cup per meal. My deal is, am I getting enough? Sure, I am taking my vitamins and eating "good" food. I make sure I get as much protein as possible and eat my veggies, but there is no room for anything else. Literally.

I am sure you have heard this before: "If you do not eat "enough" your body will break down and you will stop losing weight". I am eating about 500-800 calories per day. That's all I can fit. I really hate to add a snack mid day when I am not even hungry, ya know?

Yesterday's Food

> Breakfast: Protein Shake

> Lunch: 2 ounces chicken, 1/4 c. broccoli

> Supper: 1 small tilapia, 1/4 c. green beans

Confession: I miss food. I know it is a mind thing, but I miss sitting down and just freaking eating (way to go fatty). It is really sad! I believe I am starting to grieve food.